This Week's Haul: MBA vs JLA

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I really love Wednesdays.

I started the MBA program this week, and let me tell you, that is a lot of dry reading. Especially for someone who pretty much exclusively reads things featuring no less than three kinds of superpowers. Accounting and statistics textbooks offer no superpowers, or epic battles, or triumphs over evil, or cliffhangers. After getting my stupid school readings done, I was very happy to dive into a big stack of new comics. An added bonus was that this was a very good week for comics. Let's have a look:

Wonder Girl #1

Man, I am always happy when a good comic comes out about a teen superhero. And this is a really good comic.

So the Amazons have finished attacking, and there are a lot of dangerous mythical beasts strewn about the greater D.C. area since the Amazons were all zapped away. Someone has to clean them up, and that someone is Wonder Girl!

So here's what I liked about this comic: it gives a very brief and enjoyable overview of the character for new readers; it is very funny and entertaining to read; it has great artwork by Sanford Green; it's all-ages appropriate; it ties in to larger DC events without being confusing to people who haven't read the other comics; it gives us a little bit of the aftermath of Robin and Wonder Girl's near-kiss from Teen Titans #50; Wonder Girl is an awesome character who is feeling very sad and alone but is dealing with it by going out and helping the very people that hate her. She's a tough girl. It's rad.

And she totally goes Street Fighter Bonus Level on a military jeep!

Perfect!

Booster Gold #2

And speaking of perfect, I really could not possibly love this comic more than I do. Is anyone else just grinning like an idiot while reading each and every page? It's just so much fun!

I can't even write a paragraph about what I loved. I have to do it in point form:

- Booster's ultimatum: bring Ted back or I quit.
- Booster having to prevent Guy Gardner from becoming the greatest Green Lantern
- Sad Guy Gardner and his dying father
- Skeets using Sinestro's weakness to yellow to his advantage:

- Booster stopping Sinestro by stroking his ego:

- Sinestro twirling his moustache:

- Booster having a drink and a chat with Guy:

- Everything about Rip Hunter
- Jonah Hex!

Seriously. This comic is so fantastic.

Batman Confidential #9

The word 'terrible' gets thrown around a lot these days, but I think it can accurately describe the contents of the current arc on this series. And the one before this one. But especially this one.

This series has almost replaced All-Star Batman and Robin as my favourite terrible comic. I love reading it because it's so jaw-droppingly bad. Now, I don't like to be really negative on this blog. I'm not out to hurt anyone's feelings or whatever, but this comic is just really, really bad. In ways I can't even wrap my mind around. At least with ASB&R it's just Frank Miller being a jerk and writing a purposely bad comic for his own amusement. With this series it's more depressing because what we have is a television writer who had an idea for a Batman story and no one had the heart to explain to him that it's stupid. At least that's what I assume.

I'm not completely against playing with the origin of iconic characters, but I am against making those origin stories much, much worse. It's very stupid to write a story where the Joker gets his deformed mouth when Batman throws two batarangs at his face. It's stupider to write a story in which Batman orders a hit on the Joker. It's stupider still when the Joker is not even the Joker yet. He's just some crazy guy who robs and kills people with no gimmick. And Batman knows his name, meaning he's gonna know who the Joker is. Add to this some very clunky writing that implies the author only has the most tenuous grasp of the characters involved, and that perhaps the research ended with a viewing of Tim Burton's Batman movie ten years ago. What you have is a bad comic. With a glossy cover.

On the plus side, it gives me hope that perhaps I could one day write a Batman comic.

Justice League of America Wedding Special

Now let's get back to awesome comics.

I really liked this. Perhaps because it had very little to do with weddings and more to do with DWAYNE McDUFFIE WRITING JLA! WOOT!

It also featured awesome things like the Injustice League, Firestorm being awesome, and Hal Jordan trying to quietly get rid of some strippers he hired:

Man, that's good stuff.

I love Batman and Hal. Hal's the cool guy who hates having to ask for help, especially from annoying nerdy weirdos. And Batman is an annoying nerdy weirdo who talks all cryptic instead of just giving a straight answer because it annoys the hell out of the cool guy.

You know what else I loved? Bachelorette party at a gay bar. And, y'know, everything else.

But I do have one question. Who is this?:

What Aquaman is that? The same one I'm reading about in Aquaman right now? The ending of the last issue of JLA confused me so much.

The New Avengers #34

Is this still "new"? Can we start calling it The Avengers soon? Please?

All that I have to say about this is that I liked the little scene where Dr Strange did that spell that revealed everyone's true selves. Especially Hawkeye (or Ronin, or whatever).

Y'know, I've read pretty much this entire Avengers series and I conclude that these guys don't really do much. We've had, what, three or four issues now where they just lounge around and talk about who's a Skrull? Aren't there Hulks to stop? And aunts to save? (Actually, I'm very glad they aren't dealing with the Aunt May thing in Avengers).

Oh! Wolverine got his junk ripped off in this issue. That was neat.

Countdown Presents The Search for Ray Palmer: Wildstorm

Well this was pointless.

Seriously. I was interested in this series. I was at least curious. There's nothing terrible about the idea of crossing over DC and Wildstorm per se. It's at least interesting. But when it's as rushed as this was (and by that I mean the story was rushed along due to space restraints. I don't know how long it took to write this), it's just a jumbled mess with no purpose. This did not introduce the Wildstorm characters in any way that would make someone want to explore them more. Pages were wasted on an undeveloped and uninteresting love triangle between Kyle, Jason and Donna (Donna being the apex, sadly. If everyone was fighting over Kyle, I'd be a lot more on board).

Anyway, where was I? Oh yes. Pointless. And weird. And really just awkward. I think I'll give the rest of these a miss. I think they are basically just ads for Elseworld re-prints anyway. Like, do I need to read a story about Donna Troy, Jason Todd, Kyle Rayner and some Monitor wandering around Gotham By Gaslight? No, I don't. I'm jumping off this crazy train before they get to planet Thrillkiller. Or Planet In Darkest Knight.

Black Adam #2

And this would be what we call a good tie-in. I was surprised by how much I liked the first issue of this series, and I liked this one even more. It's decidedly not appropriate for all ages, and that's nice from time to time.

I think my favourite page was this one, which shows Adam in various locations obsessively trying out different random words in hopes of landing on his unknown magic word:

I also really like Black Adam in a Red Sox hat. I'm glad he keeps it for a couple more pages.

I also really liked seeing Ralph Dibny again, even if it was just his rotting corpse. It's just good that someone is talking about him. Where the hell is that guy's funeral?

This is just a really good comic. It's compelling, and it looks great. The 52 tie-ins are kicking the Countdown tie-ins all over the place.

Daredevil #100

One of the best comics out there gets a nice anniversary treatment this month. The story has been really exciting lately, what with Milla accidentally murdering a man, and Daredevil facing Mr Fear. This comic was as good as all Brubaker Daredevil comics, with the added bonus of having some guest artists contribute short sequences throughout. Lee Bermejo, John Romita Sr, Bill Sienkiewicz, Alex Maleev, Marko Djurdjevic and Gene Colan join Michael Lark and Stefano Gaudiano to make a really excellent-looking comic book.

It's a nice thick comic, but that's mostly due to a re-print of Daredevil #90 in its entirety. I was more excited about the page evolution stuff at the back, showing script, pencil, and ink pages from the different artists.

They didn't show the evolution of the Turner variant cover, which is good because it kinda looks like he just barfed it out. (Man, I am really mean today).

Superman #667

And Camelot Falls is almost done. I feel like I've been reading this storyline for about two years. How long has it actually been?

Not that I mind, because I've enjoyed this arc a lot. I was moved a surprising amount by Subjekt-17's confrontation with Superman. He argues that humans imprisoned and tortured him, and are therefore evil and shouldn't be protected by Superman. It's actually a pretty compelling and emotional argument, which ends in a fight between the two of them and some really heartbreaking panels:

I'm gonna miss Pacheco's art on this series.

Justice Society of America #9

First of all, awesome cover.

Secondly, I really loved the whole fire department-fundraiser pancake breakfast thing that the JSA was participating in.

And then they all go fight a fire, resulting in an awesome double-page spread:

I think JSA strikes the perfect balance between:

- the personal lives of the heroes and their interactions with each other;
- fighting evil and rescuing people;
- larger DCU events.

Now we get to see Kingdom Come Superman join the team for a couple of issues. I'm interested in seeing how this goes.

Green Lantern #23

Again, awesome cover.

I read three comics by Geoff Johns this week and they were all excellent. Just sayin'. Props.

Also, in two of those comics (this one and Booster Gold) we had Guy Gardner mentioning his abusive alcoholic father. Kinda interesting. And sad. Poor Guy.

I love Sinestro Corps. It's just so exciting. Now the lanterns have been given the ability to use lethal force! Crazy! And the battle is coming to Earth!

Alright, back to the accounting and statistics. Ehn. Maybe it will help me keep track of the multiverse.

This Week's Haul: If I only had One More Day, I wouldn't waste it reading Spider-Man

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The reviews are pretty late this week due to a combination of comics being late this week, and me being away for Friday and Saturday. But now the long wait is over.

I should mention quickly that the second podcast guest-starring me is up at The Dollar Bin. In this episode we discuss super hunks. So you can check that out here.

Alright, let's get this show on the road.

Metal Men #2

Metal Man always has been, and always will be, a very nerdy comic. And not even in the fantasy worlds and freaky alien peoples kinda way. In the way that you actually learn stuff, and if you happen to be a chemistry nerd, there are layers to the comic that only you will enjoy.

I have never been one for science. Basically anything I know about chemistry, I have learned from Metal Men comics: Mercury is liquid at room temperature, lead is heavy, and platinum is slutty.

Even though we would have nothing to say to each other, I have a pretty big crush on Will Magnus. I like guys named Magnus who build robots, and I like guys named Magnus who fight robots. It's a weakness.

Duncan Rouleau's Metal Men mini-series is so beautiful and so entertaining. When the ads said it was "exploding from the pages of Superman/Batman," I was a little worried. Nothing should explode from those pages...except my brain.

Anyway, like I say, this series is excellent. And very cute.

Look at Lead! So adorable! And look at Will! Equally adorable!

Buy this, read it, love it. I know it's science-heavy, but you can't possibly know less about science than I do, and I'm enjoying it immensely. Even if you just look at the covers it's worth it.

Outsiders #50

I am no fan of the Outsiders. Never have been. I don't care if Batman started it, they are still boring.

So imagine my surprise when I read this and really, really liked it. I haven't read any of the Five-of-a-Kind comics leading up to this, but I checked this out because it's written by Tony Bedard and had Batman on the cover. And it's the last issue of this series, as it now becomes Batman and The Outsiders.

I'll tell you what I really loved about issue #50: this guy:

Oh, Bruce. I love it when you play dress-up. Always good to see Matches.

I also really liked that the get-up didn't fool Catwoman for a second:

Also...Catwoman!

Woot! Ok, Outsiders. Sign me up for issue #1. You have my attention.

Supergirl #21

Sadly only one issue left after this one in the Bedard/Guedes run. I'm probably never going to be very interested in a Supergirl comic, but this run has been well-written and looks great. I have no complaints. Except the covers. I wish Guedes was doing them.

But look at the inside! Look at how bored she looks when Karate Kid chops her in the face!

That girl is tough. I like her and look forward to more of her Teen Titans adventures.

Jonah Hex #23

I read this last night just before I went to see 3:10 to Yuma, so it was a really excellent cowboy night all around.

I love every issue of this series, but I thought this one was especially awesome. The Jordi Bernet artwork certainly added to the awesome.

I really like the way he draws Hex. There have been many different levels of grossness in his face, depending on the artist. It ranges from it looking like raw hamburger, to just being a simple bridge of skin over his lip and a slightly larger right eye. I think Bernet strikes a perfect balance:

I really like the blank white eye. That's a nice touch. Hex should be hard to look at.

Anyway, excellent issue.

Countdown Week 34

I was happy that Piper and Trickster were the stars of this issue. Some JLA members finally caught up with them (most notably, Wally), and we start to get some answers:

Did anyone listen to the podcast (or go to the panel) of the Big Guns panel at ComicCon? It was pretty awkward to listen to, most notably because at one point someone asked why we're supposed to believe that Piper and Trickster are innocent when we clearly saw them beating Bart to death in The Flash? Paul Dini (I'm pretty sure it was him, anyway) answered by saying that, though they are doing their best, they aren't able to keep track of everything that is going on in every DC comic when they are plotting Countdown. This was the WRONG answer.

Dude. First of all, the correct answer to questions such as that, is always "Wait and see." Then your ass is covered while you go do your research or whatever and re-write stuff. Or so ten years down the line you can write a comic that reveals that the Piper and Trickster who beat Bart up were alternate Earth Piper and Trickster. Or whatever you want. The point is, it's a valid answer that does not reveal that you screwed up in any way. Because...seriously? I know you can't pay attention to every little detail of every comic, but the comic in which Bart Allan is murdered is probably worth a read.

Anyway, I didn't mean to go off on a whole thing there. I'm just saying, his answer surprised me. And disappointed me.

Black Canary Wedding Planner

That's just an adorable cover. Stephane Roux rocks.

Inside was fine. Was anyone else bothered by Green Arrow's flaming read hair? That was kinda weird. Also, I dunno. Maybe I just don't care about weddings. They should get married in the Watchtower. Hell, I would.

The All-New Atom #15

I was really glad to see this issue get away from the whole Countdown Jason/Donna/Monitor thing for a little bit so Ryan could fight some giant monsters. That was fun. I don't have anything in particular to say about this issue except it was, as always, very funny and great. And I want a Head action figure. That talks.

The Incredible Hulk #110

I thought this was pretty great. This whole series has had a lot of great "Woah! Neat!" moments, and this comic had a good one. Amadeus Cho, kid genius and Hulk fan, successfully argues that Hulk doesn't have the capability to kill anyone. It's pretty cool.

I am still really enjoying this series. It's so much more enjoyable than Endangered Species or One More Day (and, yes, I am making that call on OMD after only one issue).

I want Hulk to come around and stop trying to kill everyone, but not before he makes the heroes fight in that giant gladiator ring. Because that is going to RULE.

The Amazing Spider-Man #544

Well, this wasn't very good at all.

This really grossed me out:

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

Lucky for Iron Man he has all that armor on.

Now, I'll admit that I don't know the most about the Marvel universe, but is there a reason why Peter Parker couldn't have gone to another wealthy super hero for money for May's hospital bills besides his arch enemy? Say...Danny Rand? Anyone? Any reason at all? Was Peter just being poetic and decided Tony should be made to pay the bills?

Aw, who cares. This comic was lame.

First Impressions: Review of the Feeble Alias, By Johnathan

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Ah, the alias, that good old super-villain standby. What a relief it must be to sign into a motel under an assumed name and sleep soundly, content in the knowledge that Aquaman, for instance, is looking for someone else entirely. It's too bad that so many villains are so terrible at thinking them up. I mean, the names that most of them were born with are often bad enough - E. Nigma, I'm looking at you - but give a super-villain half an hour to think up a fake name and he'll produce something so obvious that I simply despair. I'd honestly be surprised if there wasn't a guest book somewhere with 'I. M. Captainboomerang' written in it. And the worst, the absolute worst of the lot is the Joker, the man responsible for H.A. Laughlin, L. Afterman, Joseph Kerr and so forth. That's right: Joe friggin' Kerr.

But possibly the worst of all showed up in Detective Comics No. 45, as shown in this dramatization of my internal monologue as I read this issue:


The guys in the super-keen car are in the employ of an old fellow named A. Rekoj, who just sent them out to rip off a diamond shipment. Batman showed up and there was a scrap, but the real bummer was when the freakin' Joker stole the loot! I mean, it's crazy! How did he know about the robbery?


Man, Rekoj is steamed about the whole Joker thing. I bet Rekoj and Joker are enemies from now on. Fifty years from now, people will still be talking about the Rekoj/Joker feud.


Wait a second! Hold the phone! Rekoj is the Joker! He's played us all for chumps! And he's executed his plan flawlessly! Batman's never going to figure this one out!


Holy crap! Batman figured it out! He figured out that Rekoj = Joker! How'd he do that! He just straight up earned the 'world's greatest detective' thing! Woo!

And... scene.

The really sad thing is that Batman figured it out by listening in on the Joker as he talked to himself. More like 'world's greatest dorktective', man.

NOT APPROVED

Bruce Doubtfire

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I should really save this one for my actual birthday tomorrow because I love it so much, but I can't wait.

So Batman needs to lure Catwoman into a trap. And the only way he can think to do this is to disguise himself as a wealthy, diamond-covered Southern belle.

I think he was just looking for an excuse. Like, he probably could have just strolled into the hotel as Bruce Wayne with a Rolex, but whatever.

Let's see Bruce in action:


I don't know what I love more, how he looks or how he's talking.

"Howdy, y'all!"

I can't stand it. He/she totally looks like a dude, too. Look at that jawbone!

And the best part is yet to come...

First of all, I like that Bruce is keeping the act up with Alfred while they are alone in their hotel room. Secondly I can't get enough of that panel of Bruce sans wig, but still wearing make-up and jewels. Isn't he pretty? Thirdly, I can only assume that he was wearing the Batman costume, minus the mask, under the dress. Or else Bruce just took a long break in the middle of that train of thought to change his clothes between the second and third panel.

Fantastic!

All panels from Batman #266.